


No, You Have a Sloppy Mouth

by maxbegone



Series: Schitt's Creek Tumblr Prompts [5]
Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: 700 words of fluff, Fluff, Fluff prompt, Husband Being Husbands, Lots and lots of kisses!, M/M, Post-Canon, Prompt Fill, Stevie is a teasing friend, and chasing each other around a motel room, neck kisses, no this is not a smut fic, really it's just husbands making out, the title is misleading
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:00:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24426907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maxbegone/pseuds/maxbegone
Summary: Have fun, enjoy the wine.Please don’t break the bed or scare off any guests with your raucous lovemaking ;-)- Stevie“She’s the worst.” David sets the note on the countertop.-or, Patrick's a tease and just wants to make out with David.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Series: Schitt's Creek Tumblr Prompts [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1806070
Comments: 4
Kudos: 120





	No, You Have a Sloppy Mouth

**Author's Note:**

  * For [brighterthansunshine91](https://archiveofourown.org/users/brighterthansunshine91/gifts).



> From the soft prompt meme:
> 
> 4\. neck kisses / 7. late nights / 11. toothpaste kisses / 31. road trips
> 
> For @brighter-than-sunshine on tumblr

David agreed to visiting Stevie and the knew motel she was setting up under two conditions - she provided booze and the best room there was. 

“It’s a bit of a fixer-upper,” she’d warned. “But it’s actually pretty nice.” 

And she was right. Save for a few foundation issues and some wobbly stonework outside, the place was decent. She left a key under her name for him and Patrick, but honestly at this point all David wanted to do was head to bed. They got a bit of a late start, what with having to do some last-minute inventory after closing before getting on the road for a five hour drive. They’d only stopped once for gas, but by the time they pulled up to this new motel, it was nearing midnight. 

They both showered and changed, and David was packing away his cleansers when Patrick walked back into the bathroom with their toothbrushes, handing one off to David, and a piece of paper.

David looks at the folded paper quizzically. “What’s this?”

“Did you see the note Stevie left us with the wine?” 

David shakes his head, capping his moisturizer. 

_Have fun, enjoy the wine._

_Please don’t break the bed or scare off any guests with your raucous lovemaking ;-)_

_\- Stevie_

“She’s the worst.” David sets the note on the countertop.

Patrick hums from around his toothbrush. They smile at each other in the mirror. Suddenly, without any indication, Patrick’s toothpaste-coated lips are planting a kiss on David’s clean cheek.

“Ew, _Patrick!”_ David launches back, wiping at his face and laughing. “That’s gross!”

He spits into the sink. “How is that gross? You once said I have a clean mouth.” 

“No, I once said you _look_ like you have a clean mouth. And _that-”_ David points. _“-_ is gross. You haven’t even bothered to wipe your mouth, so, sloppy.” 

A mischievous grin curls across Patrick’s lips as he inches closer to David.

“No, Patrick, _no._ I will divorce you.”

“No you won’t.”

“I won’t, but I’ll make you sleep in the car! No-” Toothbrush still in-hand, David dodges him again. 

He darts out of the bathroom and around the far side of the bed, but Patrick’s on his tail. He tackles him into the mattress and pins him down. There are still traces of drying toothpaste at the corners of Patrick’s lips. 

“Tell me I have a clean mouth.” His breath is minty.

“With the things you’ve done to me, you certainly do _not_ have a clean mouth!” 

Patrick’s eyebrows raise a little. “Say it.” 

David turns his head to the side when Patrick leans down to try and catch his lips. “Nope! No- _ha-ha!”_

They’re both laughing as Patrick presses a line of kisses down his neck toward his collarbone. They’re a little wet, a little sticky and some teeth are involved. David angles his chin back, unable to hold in his breathy, hiccuping gasps. 

Patrick slows after a moment or two, hovering above him with gentle eyes. He takes one long stroke at David’s cheekbone, then kisses him full on the lips. 

His husband is a menace.

David doesn’t push away. He embraces the kiss, sinking into it. Between that, the smell of Patrick’s body wash, and the toothpaste, it’s making him a little dizzy. 

“What time are we meeting Stevie tomorrow morning?” Patrick asks when he finally, finally pulls away.

“Ten, I think,” David says, scratching his nose.

“Good,” Patrick whispers, eyes flashing down toward his lips. “We can make out a little more, then.” 

“You have toothpaste all over your mouth.” David drags a thumb over the edges of Patrick’s lips, then moves his hand to his own neck. “You probably got it on me, too.” 

“Only a little.” He leans his head down a little more. “Hey.”

“Hm?”

“Are toothpaste kisses incorrect?” 

Patrick’s smile wides while David tries to hide his own through pursed lips. He fails. 

“With you,” he says, a little breathy. “I’ll consider them correct.” 

He pulls Patrick in again, cupping the back of his neck, but Patrick rears back.

“I hate to break it to you David, but you haven’t brushed your teeth and, uh, well I like clean mouths.” 

With a wink, Patrick removes himself from his straddle, slides right off the bed and walks back toward the bathroom, leaving David angled upright on his forearms and gaping after him. 

“Excuse me!” He swings himself off the bed to chase him. “Patrick Brewer, you’re such a _tease!”_

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr @maxbegone


End file.
